“Families don’t have to match, they are built on love.”
The Sampsons had tried everything to conceive for years before resigning themselves to the fact that they would always be aunts and uncles, until they received a text that changed their lives overnight. “We even tried the unsolicited advice of friends, family, and strangers and didn’t try. For 14 months, we tried, prayed, and waited. Month after month. Negative pregnancy test after negative test. It seemed like we were going to need assistance to conceive. We even went as far as to talk to doctors about it.”
The couple didn’t seem to get much help from the doctors. Sadie had gastric surgery and lost 28 pounds after they all told her to lose weight or she wouldn’t conceive. Sadie’s OB/GYN expressed her joy at her daughter’s weight loss and expressed her pride in her accomplishments.
“She told me that if I wasn’t pregnant within six months then she would refer me to a fertility specialist, because she couldn’t prescribe me the fertility medication,” Sadie said. “I was over the moon about that. Finally, we got something other than a no! We got a ‘not right now,’ and we were thrilled.” But sadly the couple didn’t get pregnant as they thought they would after Sadie lost the weight and they felt like they were back where they started.
Sadie received a text from a friend asking if they would consider fostering a baby that a couple she knew was considering for their baby just as the couple had decided to give up their heartbreaking attempts to conceive. The couple was initially hesitant because a caseworker had told them to look after the baby while the mother sought treatment. They were concerned that they would become too attached to the baby. However, things changed quickly after that. “The birth mom decided she would like you guys to adopt the child instead,” the caseworker said.
“We went from not having any children, to the possibility of fostering one, to, ‘You guys are parents!,’ overnight. I listened to the case worker as she talked, still in disbelief. I hung up and called my husband! ‘Babe!! They want us to adopt the baby! They want us to be parents,’ I screamed. ‘Wait! REALLY?! I thought they just wanted us to foster him!,’ he said. ‘Nope! They want us to be his mom and dad,’ I said.”
The couple spent the weekend absorbing the shocking news while also preparing for the possibility that the mother would change her mind. On Monday, the couple was informed that not only did the mother still want them to adopt the child, but that she wanted to do it herself and was ready to sign on the same day.
Through embryo donation, Sadie and Jarvis became parents to twin girls Journee and Destinee in 2021. The black couple became parents to three white children – a boy and two girls – staying true to their family motto, “Families don’t have to match.”